OMG - I've turned veggie!

Ah! I love Christmas time.
The twinkling lights, the big smiles everyone seems to give more graciously, the intended acts of love towards those less fortunate or perhaps, maybe just down and out for the day.
I love the cooler weather that gives the ok to indulge in hoodie sweatshirts with beanies, and walking around the house in fuzzy slippers. I love Christmas songs and shopping and decorating. And yes, I love, love, love my Jesus!

And let's not forget what everyone loves about Christmas time, Jesus lovers and non alike, DUH, the food! Cookies and pies and stews and cupcakes and biscuits and BREAD! Oh yes i love the food and i love Jesus and i thank Jesus so very much for all this wonderful food!
(I also ask for forgiveness because i am SO SURE gluttony is being committed by myself on a daily basis. Ok, maybe not daily but every other day. Seriously.)

It is the one time of the year where I am like, YES! I'm so happy I'm not vegan! Because there isn't any guilt if i decide to try something with a little bit of butter or cream cheese or (ugh! dare i even say it?!?!) - MILK.

I have to admit. It is difficult to even spell the word. M-I-L-K. Nasty.

I've had some haters get in my face and say, "hey - how come you hate on milk but you still eat cheese? Is that not the same thing?? huh? HUH?!?!?!" (obviously these people are really trying to trip me up, pull a fast one on me, make me feel like I'm not really doing a good job of being a veggie. Can't you see them now? With their beady eyes and pointy fingers? Accused! Accused!!)

Well haters, Yes......and NO.

My response to that is, "well how come you eat a cheeseburger but not prime rib? How come steak but not liver or tongue or whatever that nasty soup is made out of? Doesn't that all come from a cow??" Oh i get it. That stuff is gross. It's not the same. Uh huh. Totally.

Ok, ok, so I have to admit, the hater is me. Not just me, other people have said it, but i have absolutely said it to myself too. Which to me, is not necessarily a bad thing. It's good to think about stuff, figure out where you really stand and all that.
SO i guess, to be fair, instead of Haters I'll start calling them Helpers. Let's put a more positive spin on this shall we?
Alrighty then.

Now that the treat dilemma has been settled, on to the craziest thing ever. Ok, not ever but it did shock me speechless while my family laughed hysterically and one of my daughters said, "oh mommy, maybe you should blog about it.!" (ahahahahaha!!! Yeah. She's funny). But then i thought, Hey I will blog about it.

So there we are, dinner at Taco Bell. A real Christmas treat for the kiddos since we rarely do fast food and i am so ANTI McDonald's.
We decided to eat at Taco Bell before we went to look at Christmas lights. Fun!
Well, we decided to eat at Taco Bell before we went to Starbucks and got hot chocolate and then went to look at Christmas lights.

I know, the story gets healthier by the second.

Taco Bell. I do love their crunchy tacos, although I don't eat them anymore. Even better? The double decker taco. OH. YES. Crunchy and soft TOGETHER - a taco marriage that no doubt will last forever because it is so delicious.

But I'm getting off track. I don't eat that anymore either.

I do eat burritos. Bean burritos mostly but it's CHRISTMAS so I ordered a SEVEN-LAYER burrito instead. You know, to celebrate.
Actually, it was a Seven layer minus cheese and sour cream so technically, a five layer.
Still good. Still yummy.
I loooooovvvveeeee Taco Bell hot sauce. Seriously. That stuff is the bomb-diggity. I have to get like, twenty packets of it because my favorite is mild, and i can eat almost an entire packet on two bites of food. Well, I'm sure we all are aware how snazzy these little packets are these days.
Oh yeah, someone upstairs, one of the higher-ups FOR SURE thought it would be super rad to have these cutesy little sayings on the packets. Some of them are quite funny although i have to say, i think it's a little Jack In The Box-ish. I mean, if you read some of these it definitely sounds like something Jack would say. I'm not trying to imply that Taco Bell is copying or anything, just pointing out a similarity in attitude. The packet says Taco Bell but sounds like Jack. Ya know?

So here I am, about to rip open my new packet to put on my five layer burrito, oh wait, that would be my SECOND five layer burrito, and before I did, i glanced at the packet and guess what I saw? This AWESOME, saucy little phrase, oh yes, such a snippet of humor! THANK YOU Taco Bell for thinking of it.
Real smart marketing i think. I know it made me feel like i wanted to keep eating. Fo sho.

I carry my weight in my midsection.

Yep. That's it. That was the genius move to keep those tacos moving.

I carry my weight in my midsection.

So funny Taco Bell. Truly.
I try to enjoy myself when I am eating. NOT HAPPENING when i think about how those FIVE layers are going to my midsection. Seriously. I have enough issues. I don't need a saucy little packet bringing it to my attention even more.

Let's stay with things like, "You had me at taco", or "Open quickly...I'm burning up in here" or even,"Save a bun. Eat a taco."

You know, things that will make me grin, even chuckle a little, but please, please, for the love of body images everywhere - let's leave the midsection out of it.

It's been a week since this happened. I have carried that packet with me since then. Some days i have looked at it and thought, screw you Taco Bell, I'm not even hungry!
Other times, just the opposite, Screw you Taco Bell and I AM going to eat! So suck it and to change it up a little, how about sticking it on my butt instead?!?!

But that's not very productive either.
After all, maybe Taco Bell is trying to help me, ya know, control myself.

I don't know. I think they should stick to just making tacos........and leave the midsection out of it.